How to look buff when you’re skinny with a muscle shirt
Are you skinny but too lazy to go to the gym? Would you rather just fake being muscular, since you never take of your clothes in front of any girls anyway? Here’s the answer! Just strap on these fake muscles and then cover them with your favorite shirt. Who cares that you now look ridiculously out of proportion – as long as you look like you work out your chest and abs! With this new product, the muscle shirt, you can score any* girl!
*Any girl with poor eyesight, and as long as you keep a safe distance so they’re sure not to touch you.
It’s hard to believe this product is actually being sold. For the purpose of writing this article, I looked into the topic a bit further and although I couldn’t find the model in the picture for sale, I did find another brand named Funkybod which is slightly more conservative in terms of added volume and distributes a bit more evenly:
The Funkybod undershirt is designed to enhance your natural physique. Because of the way it is designed, there is a marked improvement in the look if the wearer has the typical visual manboob issues when wearing a shirt. This was not the intended market for the Funkybod muscle top. Initially, it was designed to enhance the upper body muscle groups of skinny to medium build men. After initial trials we found that some of the smaller men had manboob issues which were covered well with the Funkybod muscle top. This led us to experiment with larger men and look into the manboob issue further.
I wonder what kind of person would waste $50 US on this crap. Just get a gym membership instead. You can accomplish a lot in a month if you eat and train right, and working out shouldn’t just be for appearances.
Unless you’re also planning to buy superman spandex for Halloween and it’s for comical effect – in which case a muscle suit like Michael Bluth from Arrested Development would actually serve you better – spend some money on a book about the health benefits of good nutrition and training rather than a padded shirt. Seriously.
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1 Comment
“You can accomplish a lot in a month if you eat and train right, and working out shouldn’t just be for appearances.”
Hahaha working out *shouldn’t* be just for appearances but, let’s be honest here… For most people health is, at best, a side benefit to looking good and appealing to our standard of beauty in the western world when it comes to fitness. I mean, does anyone honestly think If there were a legitimate, cheap way to get muscle mass and tone easily without changing a bad lifestyle that the majority of gymgoers would maintain a membership? I’m not convinced. For the most part, gyms are kept in business by people’s insecurities, as are companies that make products like Funkybod – the only difference is gyms cost more and have the potential to give you a side order of healthiness with your self esteem boost.