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Interview with JustJenny

JustJenny is a 25-year old model residing in Denver, Colorado.

How would you introduce yourself to our readers?

I was born and raised in Colorado in a suburban town south of Denver. I’m the youngest of three at 25, and I have a medley of hobbies. From video gaming to cooking, writing fiction to modeling, I always have something to invest my time into! I’m passionate about volunteering and have done so both locally and internationally. I’ve waited tables at Waffle House, turned a wrench at a quick lube, and have been working as a sales operations analyst doing forensic data investigation for the past five years.

When, how and why did you first get involved in the modeling industry?

Growing up in the 90’s, it was hard to ignore Tyra Banks’ show America’s Next Top Model. I was fascinated with all the contestants from each cycle, and my mom said I would make a great model. Introverted as I was back in high school, it took a letter from John Casablancas’ Model and Talent Management program to get me excited and fully committed to learning all I could about the trade. My parents enrolled me in Casablancas’ modeling and acting program in 2007, and by 2008 I graduated with such confidence and self-respect for myself that I pursued modeling without the help of an agency. I know with certainty that I would be a completely different person today if I hadn’t enrolled in that program, and I’m grateful every day for deciding to join it.

JustJenny on a field with an antelopeWhat are your personal and professional goals? Where do you see yourself in five to ten years?

I am currently involved with writing a science fiction trilogy, and aspire to be at least a part-time author once I publish the series. Writing, like modeling, allows me to creatively express myself with no boundaries. Without those two hobbies in my life it would be a lot more dull! I’m very family-oriented, and I want to settle down and start a family soon, which is within reach. Each of these goals wake me up in the morning and make me strive to do the best that I can to achieve them!

How often are you modeling and what does it usually consist of?

Majority of my modeling is through photo shoots and runway or fashion shows. I am open-minded to any genre you can think of, yet I respect myself and my body enough to have nothing to do with erotic, implied or full nude, and anything that I will tell you right away would make me feel uncomfortable. Modeling is something I have fun with and want my friends and family to be proud of, so I firmly stand beside the decisions I make.

Please tell us about the best and/or worst experiences you’ve had so far in modeling.

I’ve had my share fair of good and bad experiences, but one of my best ones was actually the first photo shoot I was involved with after graduating from John Casablancas. I did some networking online and found a group of photographers who set something up around some of Denver’s unique graffiti sites open to all models. I was so excited, and my confidence shined through in all my photos. Each of the photographers I cycled through were pleasantly surprised when they asked me how long I had been modeling, and I answered with only a few months. Hearing their compliments on how fluid my transitions were on posing, and how keen a sense of the lighting and angles I had really helped me realize that I had found something that can truly make me feel accepting of myself. In all honesty, it freed me of any negative views I had about myself on top of being a creative outlet, and I’ve never looked back since.

JustJenny modeling a fur coatHave you had anything funny, embarrassing or completely out of the ordinary happen during your modeling career?

I went to New Mexico for a photo shoot once and shot out in the desert. It was my first time working with that photographer, but his portfolio held the type of pictures I wanted in mine, so I went out on a limb to work with him out of state. I was nervous and anxious, but after we shot my first outfit I was overwhelmed with how candid and magical the shots turned out. There was this one where I had to jump as high as I could and open my eyes into the blinding sun, and I felt like it was something we’d have to go at over and over to capture the right moment. After the first take the photographer said that we got it, and when he showed me the shot I couldn’t agree more! The movements we both envisioned actually happened on the first take, and it just felt like a connecting moment between the two of us.

Is there anything you would change about the modeling industry if you could?

When I first started out, it seemed like a majority of people assumed that I would be okay with shooting promiscuous or nude photos, just because I’m a woman with a decent figure at 5’7″. It gets under my skin when someone in the modeling industry doesn’t look past your features and makes assumptions off of your look alone before getting to know the genres you enjoy shooting, your own inner creative ideas, or how your work ethic measures up. If I could change anything it would be those preconceived misconceptions about models just in it to look pretty.

Do you practice any sports and what do you typically eat? Please elaborate on the importance of nutrition and exercise in your life.

Throughout high school I played volleyball and kick boxed, and I even joined a fencing club. I have exercise-induced asthma so anything that involves running I avoid like the plague! Nowadays I enjoy hiking around Red Rocks and Green Mountain, and I play volleyball just for fun. My boyfriend is a jiu-jitsu fighter so he’s gotten me into that quite a bit. I don’t currently practice under a gym, but it’s a gentle art that I really appreciate and enjoy.

JustJenny face closeupPlease share something people don’t know about you.

I’ve held a career-worthy job for five years, and it still comes to a shock to people when I tell them I haven’t gone to college. It was on my to-do list out of high school, but it just wasn’t in the hand I was dealt. An honest mistake for them, assuming I have a higher education because I have a stable job. I love anything to do with food, cooking and eating and socializing, and I wholly believe I was born with two stomachs by how much I can put down. All-you-can-eat-sushi? Bring it on! Endless buffet? To the front of the line! I’m also a bookworm and read whenever I’m not busy writing. I’m a hardcore RPG gamer too, and yes, my level 84 Orc on Skyrim will throw you into next Tuesday with her ebony battleaxe!

Would you change anything about yourself?

Ever since puberty I’ve struggled with cystic acne, and still haven’t gotten to a content place with the health of my skin. It’s gotten better over time, but I still have some pretty bad scarring. My goal is to look healthy without the aide of makeup. The path I’ve laid out for myself to reach that goal is coming along nicely, but as always will be a work in progress.

Are you currently in a relationship? How would you describe your partner?

Yes! I am happily taken, going on two solid years this upcoming February! He’s the coolest, silliest guy I know, and I’m blessed to have randomly met him at a Jamba Juice when he tried to take the smoothie I ordered. Each day he inspires me to push my limits, to always have as much fun as humanly possible, and to be thankful for all that we have in life. If it weren’t for him, I wouldn’t have even started writing my book. We’re a nice mixture of partners in crime, romantic lovers, and the most awesome fans in each other’s lives!

Visit JustJenny’s website for more photos and information

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Interview with Nikky Sky — Artistic Grad Student

Nikky Sky is a 22-year old model residing in Los Angeles, California.

How would you introduce yourself to our readers?

I am from Lake Tahoe, Nevada and couldn’t wait to get out of my small home town as soon as possible. However, every free moment I have now I think about going back to my family there!

I absolutely love to learn, read, practice yoga, run, work out, and keep myself in great shape. I also love to try new and exotic foods and am getting into mixology as well as being a serious foodie!

Nikky Sky topless inside a carWhen, how and why did you first get involved in the modeling industry?

I got involved in modeling and acting when I was younger but sports sort of took over my life instead. I was injured and had several life altering knee surgeries and it killed my athletic drive. However, when I moved to LA, I started modeling professionally.

What are your personal and professional goals? Where do you see yourself in five to ten years?

Finishing graduate school right now in marketing and finance is my number one goal. I obviously have other career goals linked to my degree but I personally want to be happy, healthy, successful and make my family proud in whatever I do.

How often are you modeling and what does it usually consist of?

I mostly model for fitness print, sports, bikini and clothing lines but I am also into glamour, makeup and hair prints as well!

Please tell us about the best and/or worst experiences you’ve had so far in modeling.

My favorite shoots are always for local clothing lines and local businesses. The drive and energy I get from up and coming businesses is contagious.

Since I have moved to Los Angeles and most recently Hollywood, the biggest issues I have had with modeling are the flakes and phonies that this beautiful city is full of. I have been stood up and hit on more times by “professionals” more than I can count.

Have you had anything funny, embarrassing or completely out of the ordinary happen during your modeling career?

Living in Hollywood, nothing really surprises or embarrasses me anymore!!

Nikky Sky wearing a blue topIs there anything you would change about the modeling industry if you could?

Honestly, if I started to list the things I could change I would go on for hours and hours. Being exceptionally tall and thin is a stereotype of models across the world and being only 5’6 and a bit curvy I am trying to break those stereotypes.

In addition, the stereotypes of tattoos on models in my opinion is ridiculous. I have my fair share of tattoos and still model successfully. I wish more tattooed girls would get out there and show of their art work as well!

Do you practice any sports and what do you typically eat? Please elaborate on the importance of nutrition and exercise in your life.

I run 5 days a week, practice yoga and meditation almost daily and I weight train as well. I eat organic, low calorie and low sugar diets but I eat as much as I want so I never feel starving. Health is a big part of my life but I try to be very conscious of it taking over my whole life.

Please share something people don’t know about you.

Many people don’t know that I’m color blind! I confuse red-green, blue-yellow, blue-green and most purples tend to look the same as blues and greens to me!

Would you change anything about yourself?

I am constantly striving to be better. I am somewhat of a perfectionist and I wish I could change that a bit. It makes me successful but it can also make me a little crazy sometimes!

How do you think you are most likely to die?

Definitely doing something crazy and adventurous. The crazier and more adrenaline pumping the activity, the more I want to do it!

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Interview with Reagan Savoie — From Introvert to Extrovert Model

Reagan Savoie is a 21-year old model residing in Redding, California.

How would you introduce yourself to our readers?

I’m from New Orleans, Louisiana, went to school in Texas, and have lived in Utah and California as well. My family are very religious, conservative-Republicans. I have a very European-based lineage which I use to fondly refer to myself as a European Mutt when anyone asks. I am usually quite creative with my spare time. Filling it with reading new Sci-Fi series, painting and drawing, baking and cooking all sorts of new recipes, creating music on any of the three instruments I can play, out exploring parks, or playing at home with my pets.

Back when I lived in Texas we had a ranch where I would ride horses during the summer and on different breaks from school. I currently hold an Associates of Science degree and I love aviation! It was actually one of my degrees for a year but the school I was at messed up my transcripts so I went for a Bachelor’s in Tech Management and an Applied Associates of Science degree instead. I’m still flying however and plan to get my necessary licenses and certifications on my own time.

When, how and why did you first get involved in the modeling industry?

I was a child model from the time I was about a year and a half old with Kim Dawson and then switched to The Campbell Agency a few years later. Once I hit about 12 that died off due to the fact that I looked too old to do child modeling but was still too young to do adult modeling. I started doing some freelance work and got into photography in high school. Now I am a hobby photographer, and freelance model. I also dabble in hair, make-up, and fashion due to my first roommate in college.

Reagan Savoie wearing blue jeans at a ranchWhat are your personal and professional goals? Where do you see yourself in five to ten years?

Personally, I want to have every license and certification to become a Certified Flight Instructor with Instrument and Multi-Engine ratings -CFI/II/MEI-. I want to become a well-respected model that is known for being smart as well as pretty. Professionally, I want to be doing something I love and am accomplished at. I want to be able to wake up every day being excited about what I’m going to be doing.

How often are you modeling and what does it usually consist of?

Mostly my early work consisted of fashion print work. I did have a few commercials but mainly I did posters and catalogs. In later years when I first began freelance work I was mostly helping people with their degree portfolios. They consisted of some artwork and fashion as well as glamour shots. Nowadays I’m focusing on broadening my spectrum from just photo shoots. I still consider myself mainly an art, fashion and glamour model but I also work in acting and sports work as well.

Please tell us about the best and/or worst experiences you’ve had so far in modeling.

I remember one time I was helping one of my mom’s friends expand her portfolio for her photography degree. She had me all dolled up in this amazing vintage wedding dress that I thought was the coolest thing ever. My hair was done up in this messy-bun look, I had some pretty heavy makeup on, and the best part? This lady got a friend of hers who bred Irish wolfhounds to bring three of them out to our ranch to make this shot absolutely fantastic! The whole thing had this old-timey deep South feel to it and I had a blast.

Have you had anything funny, embarrassing or completely out of the ordinary happen during your modeling career?

One time when I was younger, I did a photo shoot for someone who wanted to show a cut family scene of a grandmother and her granddaughter eating some ice cream. I was like 7 at the time. Well the producer had mentioned ice cream and set this bowl in front of me and handed me a spoon. No one told me it wasn’t really ice cream in the bowl, so naturally I had to try it. It was actually just a mixture of butter and sugar. Not terrible, but you can imagine how disappointed I was that it wasn’t actually ice cream.

Reagan Savoie looking to the skyIs there anything you would change about the modeling industry if you could?

Hundreds of things, but one that I feel like is really prevalent this day and age is people -from agencies to photographers and others- taking advantage of young models who don’t have any experience or don’t know any better but will do just about anything they’re told in order to become famous. I realize that there are places that take great care to be fair with their models, but more and more I get people requesting to work with me that will tell me a shoot is for something that I’m perfectly fine with and then after I’ve spent my time getting ready, they want to change it to something erotic, unprofessional, or additional aspects that were not part of the original agreement they want for no extra charge. I have nothing against being sexy on camera or adding to a shoot, but be honest and straight with what you want to do beforehand so that the models can make informed decisions on what they are actually getting into.

Do you practice any sports and what do you typically eat? Please elaborate on the importance of nutrition and exercise in your life.

I’ll admit I’m not the best role model when it comes to healthy eating habits -being from the South means that I love to eat good food-. However, I do try to maintain a healthy diet as much as possible. I love sports though. Throughout school I did soccer, basketball, volleyball, tennis, cross country, and track. I still get out on occasion to play a game or to go for a run. Every now and then I’ll get in a fitness craze when I feel like I’m letting myself go or eating too much and I’ll do a couple weeks of Insanity or some other type of workout routine that includes daily cardio and stretches.

Please share something people don’t know about you.

I am a total introvert. I have always been the shyest person in the room and even now I tend to stay in and read before going out to meet new people. But I try something new every day and I try to meet at least one new person every week. I keep on a constant smile when I’m out and about because you never know whose day you’ll brighten because of a simple smile.

Reagan Savoie next to a lakeWould you change anything about yourself?

The one and only thing I would change about myself is my scoliosis. For those of you who don’t know what that is, it’s when a person’s spine is curved or twisted for various reasons. Mine is because my spine is for a person much taller than I am. If my spine were completely straight I would be somewhere around 5’9″-5’10” -according to doctors- instead of the 5’6″ I’m at right now. Because of the lack of space for my spine, I have an S curve in it which makes stretching and staying flexible difficult but not impossible.

What is the one talent you wish you possessed?

I really want to learn falconry, also known as hawking. It’s where you hunt game with a trained hawk or other bird of prey of your choosing. The best way to do it is raise the bird yourself from a very young age. I think this would be the coolest thing ever because 1) It’s different, and 2) I would have my own personal bird of prey! I would probably go with an Aplomado Falcon personally. I actually have a picture with one on my Facebook page.

Visit Reagan Savoie’s website for more photos and information

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Interview with Katja Gee — nude model writing about the experience

Katja Gee is a 26-year old model residing in San Luis Obispo, California.

How would you introduce yourself to our readers?

I was born and raised in small-town San Luis Obispo, California. I’m an only child, and a bit of a tomboy: most of my childhood consisted of climbing trees, building forts, riding horses, and generally finding adventures outside in our rural area.

When I’m not modeling, I’m usually writing—particularly on my website’s blog, where I share a weekly essay on nudity, modeling, art, productivity, working as a freelancer, and self-improvement. I’m also quite a nerd. I read and write science fiction and fantasy novels, and I’m obsessed with Starcraft II. I also compose and play music, dance ballet, and enjoy the occasional glass of really nice scotch.

Katja Gee nude face closeupWhen, how and why did you first get involved in the modeling industry?

Five years ago, I started out as a life drawing model—someone who poses nude as a reference for drawings, paintings and sculptures. A friend of the family, now retired, had posed for a painting when she was in her early twenties. The painting hangs in her living room, and it makes her incredibly happy every time she looks at it. It reminds her of the “good old days” when she was young and had just met her husband. Her painting inspired me to try posing nude for a drawing class at my local college for the first time.

That first drawing class grew organically into a whole career, and today I work full-time as a freelance model. I still pose for life drawing classes, but now I work as a photographic art model too.

What are your personal and professional goals? Where do you see yourself in five to ten years?

Posing for life drawing classes is something that I can do no matter how many years in the future. Traditional artists need human subjects of all shapes, sizes, genders, and ages to study—it’s not uncommon for models to keep posing into their eighties and even nineties.

Photographic art nude modeling has a bit more of an expiration date. Most women stop modeling full-time in their late twenties to mid thirties. Although I plan on modeling for art photographers for as long as someone will point a camera at me, I’m expecting it to be a viable full-time occupation for the next three to five years.

I plan on expanding my writing over the next few years as well. My blog is certainly a start, and I hope that I’ll be writing full-time within the next five to ten years.

How often are you modeling and what does it usually consist of?

I model full-time. About half of my bookings are photo shoots, and half are life drawing sessions. All of it is art modeling, whether for drawings, paintings, sculptures, or photographs for gallery shows and fine art books. Most of it is nude, although I do occasionally pose clothed for portrait sessions or boudoir photography. During the summer, the majority of my shoots are actually underwater—both the photographer and I will be shooting in a pool for several hours at a time to create this surreal genre of image. And of course, a large amount of my time is spent keeping a freelance business running: emails, scheduling, marketing, booking, taxes, and other paperwork are all “unpaid” hours that are necessary to support my art.

Katja Gee lying on a treePlease tell us about the best and/or worst experiences you’ve had so far in modeling.

The best experiences have been crafting long-term creative, artistic, and working relationships with other artists. I have photographers, artists, and other models that I work with on a regular basis, and have for several years. We have written and published books, organized several art gallery openings, and planned modeling tours together. These people are more than just co-workers and fellow artists to me; they’ve become family.

I’m very lucky that in the years I’ve been modeling, I’ve only had one negative experience with a photographer that tried to push my boundaries. I think that says a lot about how incredible, forward-thinking, and supportive the artistic modeling community is. It’s truly full of wonderful people.

Have you had anything funny, embarrassing or completely out of the ordinary happen during your modeling career?

The most embarrassing thing that has ever happened to me modeling occurred during a life drawing class that I posed for at my local college. My foot fell asleep very early into a two and a half hour pose, but I didn’t realize that I’d lost feeling in my whole leg all the way up to the hip joint as well. When the timer went off, I stomped on my foot to get my circulation going again. Unfortunately, my leg had other ideas, and instead I fell over rather spectacularly. That should have been the end of it, except the modeling stand was wheeled so that it could be moved in and out of the classroom. I ended up taking out half the class with the modeling stand, and falling headfirst into the lap of a student on the other side of the room while still naked–and unable to stand up, because my leg still wasn’t working.

Is there anything you would change about the modeling industry if you could?

There seems to be a stigma against nudity in the modeling industry, and a stigma against models that pose nude in particular, that I would change if I could. Most people when they hear I pose nude automatically assume that what I do is sexual. They assume that art nude modeling is equivalent to stripping or pornography. To me, posing nude isn’t any more or less sexual than any other act. Yes, the nude female form can evoke sexuality, or sensuality. But it can also express other emotions—innocence, joy, despair. I think that it’s incredibly closed-minded to think that the human body can only mean one thing without the trapping of clothes. The concept of nudity being artistic—or even normal—is not a common one, but I think we would all be more comfortable with ourselves if we disassociated from the idea that nudity is inherently sexual.

Katja Gee modeling a black dressDo you practice any sports and what do you typically eat? Please elaborate on the importance of nutrition and exercise in your life.

I get the majority of my exercise through a combination of ballet and backpacking. Although I also go to the gym occasionally, I’ve always been a tomboy and an artist. I enjoy spending time dancing and being out in nature more than doing reps.

Nutritionally, I eat mostly vegetarian and make a lot of simple green smoothies.

Being strong is more important to me than being attractive, and I value my body for what it is capable of, not how it looks. I care more that I can dance en pointe or carry a forty pound pack for 20 miles a day than whether I look pretty. And I find that when I concentrate on my capabilities, I end up looking better than if I had worked solely on aesthetics in the first place.

Please share something people don’t know about you.

Some people might know that before I was a model, I actually worked as a professional musician—I taught piano lessons, accompanied choirs, and even played keyboard in a short-lived band. Something most people don’t know is that I studied ancient Germanic linguistics in college, and my senior project was translating 110 pages of Anglo-Saxon poetry. I mentioned that I was a nerd, right?

Would you change anything about yourself?

I’m always trying to change and improve something about myself, whether it’s physical or mental. I’m constantly trying to be stronger and more productive, and to be a better writer and model—you could call me a self-improvement junkie!

What superpower do you wish you had? Why?

Shape-shifting, as long as it wasn’t size-constrained. I think it would be incredibly versatile. You could craft yourself wings to be able to fly, or shrink until you were tiny enough to sneak into places without being noticed. Even subtle changes in your own physical appearance would be useful. Imagine what you could do as a model if you could change your body shape or facial structure on a photo shoot!

Visit Katja Gee’s website for more photos and information

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Interview with Alexandra Ford — Fashion blogger, photographer & model

Alexandra Ford is a 24-year old model residing in Pismo Beach, California.

How would you introduce yourself to our readers?

I was born in Owensboro, Kentucky and lived there until I was about 20. I’d never wanted to leave a place so bad! So I moved to downtown Chicago to finish my last two years of college at The Art Institute. I had a bit of culture shock at first, but Chicago has so much to offer. There is always something to do. Once I finished college I moved to Pismo Beach, California. Ever since I was a child I’ve always wanted to live in California. I’ve had a few modeling opportunities here since it is so close to Los Angeles. I will be moving to LA permanently in a few weeks so that I can pursue modeling further. I’m so excited to live in a big city again!

When, how and why did you first get involved in the modeling industry?

I first started out doing photography in high school. I became bored of landscapes and nature, so I bought a tripod and used the camera timer to take pictures of myself. I was somewhat impressed with them so I started posting regularly on fashion sites and soon after began my own fashion blog. It all grew from there. People would contact me asking me to model for them or to help them build their photography portfolios, and I’ve been working with a lot of different photographers ever since. I just started using Model Mayhem and I’ve gained a lot of modeling opportunities from that as well.

What are your personal and professional goals? Where do you see yourself in five to ten years?

There are many creative jobs I would love to pursue. I love styling, doing make-up, and blogging about fashion. I also love painting and illustration. Of course I would love to be a full-time model, traveling around to different places and meeting new people, but that’s a bit of a stretch. We’ll see how it goes when I move to LA! As long as I’m happy with what I’m doing I count that as a huge success.

Alexandra Ford on a road wearing sunglassesHow often are you modeling and what does it usually consist of?

I model at least once a week. It usually just consists of me doing different poses for the photographer at a location we both agree on. So far I have styled all my own shoots with clothes from my closet and makeup from my bathroom. I always love doing my own hair and makeup, since I have basically tried everything and I know what looks good. I’ve done studio shoots, outdoor shoots, and video shoots. Outdoor shoots are definitely my favorite. I mostly work by myself, but I always love to work with another model. It gives me a chance to meet someone and make connections.

Please tell us about the best and/or worst experiences you’ve had so far in modeling.

I’ve had many great experiences. I’ve visited some of the most beautiful places! Shooting in the Oceano dunes was probably the best. I felt like I had landed on another planet. The giant hills of sand were breathtaking. The worst experience would have to be when I was posing in the middle of a succulent patch on the beach. I looked down and there were huge spiders literally everywhere. I had to force myself not to look down no matter what I felt crawling on my legs!

Have you had anything funny, embarrassing or completely out of the ordinary happen during your modeling career?

Yes! I think the craziest experience would have to be when I was shooting on my own by a creek, with just my tripod. This happened to be back in Kentucky on my grandparents’ farm at dusk. I heard some coyote’s howling not too far away, but I wasn’t too worried at the time. Several minutes later I heard something rustling, and turned around to see tawny fur and eyes hiding behind the bushes. I freaked out because I thought a coyote was stalking me! It turned out to be two young fawns, and I couldn’t have felt more relieved.

Is there anything you would change about the modeling industry if you could?

I wish I could change what is perceived as “beautiful,” a lot of people don’t understand that anything outside of a size 0 can be beautiful. Don’t get me wrong, I find so much beauty in a tall, thin model working a Chanel runway. But I find just as much beauty in a curvier plus-size model. So many women beat themselves up for not being pretty enough, or thin enough, or tall enough. I used to be one of them. I’m more confident now than ever because I’ve learned that you have to embrace what you have, not dwell on what you don’t and never will have.

Alexandra Ford at the beachDo you practice any sports and what do you typically eat? Please elaborate on the importance of nutrition and exercise in your life.

My exercise routine is pretty laid back. I walk a lot, and before I go to bed I do crunches and squats. I drink a LOT of water! Between 65 to 80 ounces a day. I love coffee and tea, I drink at least two cups a day of each. My go-to food of the moment would be carrots dipped in hummus. I love oatmeal with peanut butter. I’m actually a vegetarian, so I eat a lot of nuts, vegetables and fruits. Quinoa black bean burgers are definitely my favorite meal! Every now and then I splurge on potato chips and frozen yogurt.

Please share something people don’t know about you.

I’m obsessed with Nintendo games. I love everything Mario and Sonic. My favorite game right now is Mario Kart 8! It’s so much fun. I can waste hours and hours playing video games.

Would you change anything about yourself?

There will probably always be days where I’m like, “I wish my hair was a little longer,” or “I wish I had thinner thighs,” but honestly what good does that do? You are you for a reason. There is beauty in everyone. It has taken me 24 years to become completely confident and happy with myself and my body. I wouldn’t change a thing about myself.

What superpower do you wish you had? Why?

I wish I could morph into a mermaid. I love everything about the ocean. I love snorkeling in reefs and swimming with whale sharks. I love venturing to shipwrecks, they’re so ghostly and interesting! A dream of mine is to be an underwater model in the middle of a shipwreck. Marine life is so fascinating and beautiful; if I could spend every day exploring the ocean I would do it in a heartbeat!

Visit Alexandra Ford’s website for more photos and information

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Interview with Candace — a courageous outgoing risktaker.

Candace is a 22-year old model residing in San Diego, California.

How would you introduce yourself to our readers?

My lovely name is Candace Carroll, friends and family call me just candy. I was born is Sunny Day go, I have two older brothers also an older sister; they have their families, I’m not at that stage yet in my life even though it would be a blessing to have God just knows when you as a person -well my case- myself is fully ready for that responsibility putting a roof over a family is.

My interests are more of a technique style in playing pool, loving the beach and the warm sun, My profession is criminal justice and a few languages, I am an outgoing hard-working woman and I don’t let anybody take me for granted; life is amazing but I always say “Life is just a mere chance, live it like every emotion matters, a mere chance is worth living for”.

When, how and why did you first get involved in the modeling industry?

As an 18 year old fresh out of high school, my close friend was asking beautiful women to shoot for portfolios and offered me a try and I just fell in love with angles, dimensions and especially the beauty in this type of art, I may not be able to draw like a tattoo artist but being a model, being in front of a camera posing has beauty in it, the perfect lighting, posture, face and body angling is exactly what I love doing, making a new pose is my art, that’s my expression and I would love to be doing this for a very long time, beauty is always alive, it never fades beauty is everywhere we just forget the beauty in simplicity at times.

Candace on a bedWhat are your personal and professional goals? Where do you see yourself in five to ten years?

My personal goal is more of a family goal, first is to take my parents out of this crazy place and buy a home for them to retire and enjoy their lives, I am the strongest person when it comes to them but also when it’s about them I’m the weakest, they are my strength and my weakness and anything I do, I want them to be beside me in moving up in this world, I see myself in five years being a lawyer and helping people fight for themselves and actually prove they want to change and live better than before, five years after that, I want to be a judge and just do good for people who deserve a second chance.

How often are you modeling and what does it usually consist of?

I mainly do shoots, it’s a very easy schedule. I model in fashion, erotic, glamour, editorial and commercial, the work hours are fairly simple. A few hours in a day depending on photographer, which I don’t mind whatsoever.

Please tell us about the best and/or worst experiences you’ve had so far in modeling.

Anytime I model I love every second of it, I never had a bad experience; every photographer I have had was very professional and respectful, I understand their viewpoints and their dislikes in working with certain type of people which understand can’t take criticism for their professional services experiences.

Have you had anything funny, embarrassing or completely out of the ordinary happen during your modeling career?

In my few loving modeling years, it’s been a good one no complaints in any field, I can’t even think of one thing to be completely real and probably sad but it was professional and comforting.

Is there anything you would change about the modeling industry if you could?

If I could, I would change the way that media portrays females to young children, that being skinny is in and being built bigger is something to feel bad about; beauty is in the eye of the beholder and only seeing beauty in one thing but not another shows for a narrow minded person, beauty is everywhere in the sky above, in the color of the ocean, the way every woman is, their motherly nature, the trees in the forest, animals, being in love and even feeling pain, pain is an emotion that brings color no matter how down a person is they way a person heart feels the inside of a person’s mind, body and spirit is beautiful, nobody should feel judged only by looks alone.

Candace at the beachDo you practice any sports and what do you typically eat? Please elaborate on the importance of nutrition and exercise in your life.

I honestly eat as much as I can, I work out at night time after a long day, I eat protein, and fruit, being healthy in this industry is a great thing especially to promote health to young children growing up.

Please share something people don’t know about you.

Let’s see! I’m an awesome pool player, better than novice, better than beginner and rookie, just a little before professional, and I love being challenged; it’s the best thing to know someone expects you to be a better you, learning everyday to be better than yesterday, that is my personal self goal.

Would you change anything about yourself?

I wouldn’t change a thing, improve yes, change, I’m God’s creature, I am beautiful the way he made me, if I was supposed to be something I’m not, I would have already been that but I’m not so I apologize if that answer was boring.

If you had only 24 hours left to live, what would you do?

If I had 24 hours on this planet to live, I would take my parents everywhere and anywhere they wanted in their whole life to visit and explore, my parents mean the world to me, I would want to see my last few hours just seeing them smile and happy for that will be their last and most emotional favorite memory of their baby girl, their little girl, to make my parents happy will be a great ending to my life.

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Interview with Marylyn Brooks — Aquarian ArTist, MoonChild & Musician

Marylyn Brooks is a 23-year old model residing in Los Angeles, California.

How would you introduce yourself to our readers?

I grew up in the suburbs of Southern California, in a city called Rowland Heights. I began getting into mischief at a young age and snuck out to pierce my belly button when I was 13. I attended a strict catholic school from kinder garden till 8th grade and then an all girls catholic high school which was much, much worse. Finally, I convinced my parents to let me transfer to an art high school where they played political beatles songs through the loudspeakers at lunch. I fell in love with the school, with art, with music and with myself… and the rest is history!

When, how and why did you first get involved in the modeling industry?

I did a commercial when I was a child and it seemed to flow so naturally to me… but I didn’t start taking it seriously until I was about 16 and I was gogo dancing at all the underground raves. The event photographers began to offer me paid shoots and I really took a liking to it. Soon after, I was picked up by a commercial agency and began booking like crazy.
I was supposed to attend NYU university but the year I graduated my parents got divorced and my father said he wasn’t going to help me like he had promised and so I moved to Hollywood and began taking acting and commercial modeling very seriously because I needed the income while still pursuing my arts.

Marylyn Brooks modeling with two guysWhat are your personal and professional goals? Where do you see yourself in five to ten years?

I plan to continue acting and modeling but I am turning my main focus to my band Bizarra, which I sing and play guitar in. Bizarra is my heart’s truest desire and I shall keep pursuing it until the Lotus flowers blossom. I’m also in the process of publishing two children’s books out of a series of books I have written and illustrated, titled “My Mogwhy and Me”. Aside from that, I create and sell my original paintings under the art name No.Y2K and have exhibits quite often. I also just started a new art collective and record label called The Hissing Cats, so I plan to do more with that as everything gradually progresses.

How often are you modeling and what does it usually consist of?

When I get booked for modeling gigs they’re pretty much always print work because I’m 5’1… 5’2 on a good day, and I don’t fit the norm. I use to book mostly 18 to play younger roles but now that I’ve gotten a lot more tattoos I am booking mostly rocker-type shoots, which I am happy about. I am alwwwaaayyysss late and I always feel horrible about it but there’s just some things you can’t change about life.

Please tell us about the best and/or worst experiences you’ve had so far in modeling.

The best experience was shooting with Leg Avenue because afterwards I got to be a guest on a bunch of cool radio shows and interviews, and at the time, I still went by my rave name Sparkle Sparkle Bang bang, so I landed a lot of additional work from that as well. The worst experience was when I shot this short film, which actually turned out amazing, but during the shooting of it the guy kept making all these weird sexual comments and told me he was “getting aroused and needed to adjust himself”. And then, he had the nerve to ask me to shoot additional footage a week later and for no extra compensation and we ended up getting into a very heated argument, and I never heard from him again.

SparkleHave you had anything funny, embarrassing or completely out of the ordinary happen during your modeling career?

In 2011, right after booking a national ESPN SuperBowl commercial, I was hit and run while riding my bike during the middle of the day. The car hit the back of my tire, throwing me from the bike and on to my jaw, breaking my jaw in 4 different places and knocking out 9 of my teeth and splitting several more in half. I remember coming out of my blackout and immediately thinking of the shoot, which was set to take place the same week. While holding up my hanging jaw, I remember thinking “God, please let me be able to ice it and fix it before the shoot”… but after I saw myself in the mirror I knew that wouldn’t be the case. I was so devastated to say the least. My jaw was wired shut for 3 months and I had surgery after surgery for about 2 years. I am still dealing with complications from my accident and they never caught the driver… but everything happens for a reason… even the ugly stuff… because during the time when my jaw was wired shut I began to teach myself guitar and then formed the band Bizarra a year later. I grew up playing the violin and was made Principal Second String Violinist by the Claremont Symphonic Youth Orchestra that I was in for many years but had dropped it all together upon moving to Hollywood. I guess my accident was a blessing in disguise…a horrible… rotten… painful… miserable disguise haha.

Is there anything you would change about the modeling industry if you could?

I would change the current expectations of models. I would do away with paper thin, anorexic models and replace them with healthy, happy, beautiful models that would give young girls more positive body images to look up to. So many young girls develop all sorts of addictions and eating disorders because they want to look like the women in the magazines. But they don’t know that those women struggle and harm themselves continuously to look the way they do.

Do you practice any sports and what do you typically eat? Please elaborate on the importance of nutrition and exercise in your life.

I try to go to the gym as much as possible, probably like 2 to 4 times a week. Sometimes when I miss more than a week of the gym and I’ve been binge eating, I will force myself to stay at the gym at least 3 hours. I try to eat as healthy as possible; all organic, mostly vegetables, and organic meat from time to time. My weakness is cake and candies… most desserts, really. I don’t limit or restrict myself when it comes to food I truly enjoy because it makes me happy to indulge a bit, but I try not to eat past 7:30pm and I stay far away from over processed GMO foods. If you can’t pronounce more than 2 ingredients, don’t eat it. And if any of the first 5 or main ingredients are long chemical names, hydrogenated-anything or colors such as RED-40, avoid it at all costs!

Marylyn Brooks wearing a bridal dressPlease share something people don’t know about you.

I have really poor eyesight. It’s gotten so bad, I can’t even see my own tattoos without my glasses. But I still go without them for long periods of time and I just deal with seeing blurry all day. Sometimes friends pass me in the street and think I’m ignoring them or mad at them because I don’t wave back and things like that haha. When I don’t wear my glasses I feel like I’m in my own little world of fuzzy life.

Would you change anything about yourself?

I would remove all judgements from my mind. Judgments against myself and against others. It is so hard not to criticize myself sometimes, but I always try to see myself and those around me through the eyes of the Buddha, free of judgments and from a place of love and appreciation. I feel like we make it a habit to put ourselves down to others, as not to seem full of ourselves or prideful. But there needs to be a happy medium.

What is the longest you have gone without taking a bath?

I went hitchhiking for 3 months last year with some friends that have been living off the grid for a few years and I wanted to see life from that perspective. I wanna say, the longest I went without showering was 7 days… give or take. It was rough and very unpleasant. I would not suggest it to any one unless they really wanted to shake up everything they knew about life and find our very deep truths about themselves. I definitely found myself while on the road… and I found the same person I had left as haha, just dirtier and weathered.

Visit Marylyn Brooks’s website for more photos and information.

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Interview with Bunny Girl

Bunny Girl is a 24-year old model residing in Long Beach, California.

How would you introduce yourself to our readers?

I was born in Boston and currently live in Long Beach California, just moved here in June. I don’t have kids but I spoil my pet rabbit Puffins, he’s my furchild. I’m currently unemployed, hoping to make a career in music; I write my own lyrics and melodies and perform on the streets and at open mics. I like to go to yoga, take my bunny for walks in his petstroller, and I enjoy bringing people together and helping people out in any way I can; building community is important to me so if I have something I can share or give, I do it.

When, how and why did you first get involved in the modeling industry?

I haven’t been in the industry too long; I started modeling when I was a kid and my mom tried to get me and my sister to act, but we weren’t too interested back then. Then maybe 4 or 5 years ago my former boyfriend started taking photos of me and it was fun finding spots and coming up with creative ideas; I was always very photogenic, then I started contacting local photographers and I’ve worked with some in Boston as well as some here in California

What are your personal and professional goals? Where do you see yourself in five to ten years?

I really enjoy modeling, but it’s kind of hard finding jobs when you’re on the short side. My professional goals are to just do what I love, which is being creative. I just want to start focusing more on my music because to me music is so universal, it brings people together and I just want everyone to realize their purpose and potential; we all have problems, but everyone here deserves love and I want to spread that kind of awareness to my brothers and sisters. In five to ten years I see myself having some type of positive influence. I don’t do anything for money or fame I do things with love, my purpose here is to unite people and help those who are lost.

Bunny Girl wearing a black dressHow often are you modeling and what does it usually consist of?

I model at least once a month; I mainly do shoots, glamour, art nudes, bikini, sometimes I get hair shows as well; again it’s hard finding work when you’re on the short side, but it’s awesome when I find open minded photographers who are just looking to get creative because creativity is very important.

Please tell us about the best and/or worst experiences you’ve had so far in modeling.

I went on a group beach shoot in Malibu; there were probably 6 girls there and ten photographers. I had my make up done and the artist painted my lips yellow which I thought was awesome because I like to paint my face crazy and put diamonds on it, so I was down. Only one photographer was into it and I felt a little discouraged, but I’m unique, I like to be different and I’m always going to be myself where what I want no matter how outlandish it is to me, it’s their loss.

Have you had anything funny, embarrassing or completely out of the ordinary happen during your modeling career?

I actually got scammed on Model Mayhem, someone posing as a photographer sent me a check, told me to cash it, then deposit some into the “designers” account. The check bounced and the bank took all my money, luckily I was able to get the money back, I felt so stupid, but I give everybody the benefit of the doubt. I like to believe that the world is full of good people because we are inside the same; some call it vulnerable, or naive, but I’m not a bitter cold person, I give everything a chance.

Is there anything you would change about the modeling industry if you could?

I’ve always dreamed of being on the runway; I wish they allowed shorter girls to work runway and fashion, the industry should be more open minded when it comes to height and weight. If you look good and you have that presence then why not give the model a chance?.

Bunny Girl with naked shoulderDo you practice any sports and what do you typically eat? Please elaborate on the importance of nutrition and exercise in your life.

Stretching is very important. I go to yoga at least 5 times a week, the best exercise is dancing: it’s fun and it gets your energy up. As for nutrition I’m vegan, I don’t eat any kind of animal products. I like to make vegetable dishes, soups, salads. People assume it’s hard to eat this way, but it’s actually very easy, they even have vegan ice cream and cookies that taste better than the regular stuff.

Please share something people don’t know about you.

I’m very shy but when I’m on stage or in the spotlight that seems to melt away and I feel I’m where I’m supposed to be.

Would you change anything about yourself?

No, I appreciate what I have on the outside and to me we look the way we do for a reason; the way we appear outside is how we are supposed to be and it’s perfect.

What was the meanest rumor ever spread about you?

Boys seem to think that just because you are comfortable enough with your body to wear something revealing that you’re automatically a whore; I like to wear tight clothes and lacy see through stuff, to me it’s about style, so some guys start saying rumors that I have STD’s and that I sleep with a lot of people, but I don’t take anything personally, it’s just a reflection of their insecurities and I empathize with that.

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Interview with Paraseau Bear — Fiery Phoenix w a Heart of Gold

Paraseau Bear is a 25-year old model residing in Los Angeles, Callifornia.

How would you introduce yourself to our readers?

Hi I’m Paraseau. I’m an image and sound maker residing in Los Angeles. I love telling stories.

When, how and why did you first get involved in the modeling industry?

I became involved in modeling when I realized I’d get jealous of the girls auditioning for roles on the music videos and other projects I was making that I to wanted to be a work of art, an object of art as well as a creator of art. Jealousy I quickly transmute to inspiration and motivation and began pursuing a career in front of camera.

What are your personal and professional goals? Where do you see yourself in five to ten years?

In five or ten years, I’d love to be gracing magazine covers, touring the world to sold out stadiums, collaborating with the most amazing designers, tour managers, costume designers, producers, and directors. My idols will become my creative family and I’ll start a family of my own. I’ll be proud of the woman I’ve become and what I’ve contributed to the world one day at a time through full surrender to the greatness bursting through me.

Paraseau Bear upside downHow often are you modeling and what does it usually consist of?

Fashion, swimsuit, lingerie, editorial. I also act commercially and theatrically.

Please tell us about the best and/or worst experiences you’ve had so far in modeling.

I’ve only had good experiences. I’ve learned so much about myself how to best support and express myself, take care of myself, how to collaborate creatively and artistically with others and how to be a living, breathing, moving work of art and grace.

Have you had anything funny, embarrassing or completely out of the ordinary happen during your modeling career?

There are always embarrassing moments in set, trying to give the photographer what she or he wants, doing quick changes in odd places. It’s definitely an exercise in fully accept myself and owning my power and knowing every outtake just helps build laughter and relationships. Like I used to do this funny growling face that I thought was fierce until a photographer showed me what it looked like and it just looked… Weirdly demented. I had to laugh it off and find another look for the moment. You gotta be able to laugh at yourself, be easy, and relax into your happiness for the camera.

Is there anything you would change about the modeling industry if you could?

I think it’s great. I’m really happy that more sizes and shapes are being embraced. I’m curvy and have such striking features like red hair, I often thought about modeling but thought I wasn’t the “right type”. Turns out the industry recognizes beauty as beauty. Simpler than the voices in my head at the time.

Do you practice any sports and what do you typically eat? Please elaborate on the importance of nutrition and exercise in your life.

I have been a student of yoga most of my life, and lately I’ve been running in the hills around my house several times weekly. I also took up ballet and hip hop. I love the discipline and the freedom, respectively. I also love that it’s a fluid moving art form and I get to be the embodiment of that art form.

I’m vegan and gluten free and all that other stuff that being in the industry in LA lends itself toward. It feels good in my heart and body to eat clean.

Paraseau Bear wearing a yellow dress and blue hatPlease share something people don’t know about you.

Although in a red head with light skin, my family grew up in and around Native American reservations most of my life due to my parents’ careers. So that culture and the spiritual practices of the tribes we lived with are very much a part of who I am.

Would you change anything about yourself?

I would maybe be a little less stubborn, but it’s a family trait and a lot of beautiful things have come out of the tenacity of it as well.

I would also maybe be a little more trusting of the Universe and not feel like I need to work hard at things and instead love in grace a little more.

If you were the opposite sex for one day, what would you do?

If I was the opposite sex for one day, I would make love to the most beautiful and kindest woman I know, I would wear the best business suit and walk into a meeting like I owned the place, and I would pee standing and write obnoxious things in the snow with my urine, I’d pull the move that the dude in American psycho does during sex and watch myself flex muscles in the mirror, and then I’d finally take a kid or a grandparent or both out to ice cream and pick up the kid and toss them in the air a few times. I might also dress like a girl and just see what kind of looks is get from people.

Visit Paraseau Bear’s website for more photos and information

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Interview with Freya Gallows

Freya Gallows is a 24-year old model residing in San Jose, California.

How would you introduce yourself to our readers?

I grew up in the Silicon Valley and originally went to school for engineering before opting to spend my youth stumbling around the world without a plan instead. I don’t really live anywhere; I spent the beginning of this year living out of a backpack around Southeast Asia and Australia, went to Reno to spend six months building Embrace, which is a large art Burning Man art project, will spend the fall roaming and camping around California and the winter home-basing in New Mexico in order to hunker down for a few projects that I haven’t been able to work on from the road.

Modeling has been my primary source of income for the last five years, though I’m just as much a dabbler as I am a wanderer, and I’ve also gotten work teaching skiing, practicing Thai massage, harvesting beets, freelance writing, building trails, I did a lot of rock work on the PCT, operating heavy machinery, taking care of horses, and I’ve spent much of the last few years volunteering for Burning Man, for which this year I spent six exhausting months on the build crew for Embrace. It’s both my greatest fortune and somewhat limiting that I do not have a singular passion to devote my focus to, and that my interests diverge into a squillion facets.

Freya Gallows wearing black lingerieWhen, how and why did you first get involved in the modeling industry?

The “how” came before I knew the “why”: Initially I didn’t pursue modeling so much give in to it. At twelve, I was a really tall, gawky little string bean and my parents were approached about my potential as a future model, though they thought it’d be damaging for me to enter that world as a kid, and I vehemently agree. Once puberty did its job, I was still tall and thin, but not “agency-standard” tall and thin, so I never looked into modeling as an option until I was approached by a photographer who told me about freelance modeling. After that, it wasn’t until two years after I’d signed up for a Model Mayhem account that I went to a shoot. I was curious and nervous but a bit reluctant.

At that first shoot, I unexpectedly found myself completely transformed, free to explore a character. Modeling has gotten me more acquainted with my own body, and with sides of myself I don’t often see: I’m not someone people would describe as glamorous, girly, flirtatious, or fashionable. It’s play and experimentation, and it’s freeing.

What are your personal and professional goals? Where do you see yourself in five to ten years?

Well, I’m planning to spend next spring doing a modeling tour up the Atlantic Coast, Florida through Maine, on a bicycle. The prospect’s terrifying to me, which is why I’m making myself do it.

Otherwise, modeling-wise, I’d like to get my butt over to Europe for a tour; I’m thinking next summer I’ll skip Burning Man and do just that. And I’ve always got my mental fangirl-list of models and photographers I want to work with or meet or get to know better.

As for five- or ten-year plans, I don’t believe in planning that far into the future; I’m a creature of change, which I think we all are, if we’re experiencing healthy growth, and have no idea who I’ll be or what I’ll want in five years, it’ll depend on what I experience and learn in the meantime. If I try to limit my five-years-into-the-future self to pursuing what I think I’ll want, right now, then I wouldn’t have as much room to explore or change.

Freya Gallows wearing black dress in black backgroundPlease tell us about the most memorable experiences you’ve had so far in modeling.

There was one time I got to crush a car with a track loader. Another time where we were interrupted by a herd of very curious cows; one came up and started licking my elbow. Another time when a hair stylist turned my hair into a three-foot-wide cloud, which I had on the one-hour train ride home. Once I posed in a zentai suit and ankle cuffs in an old elementary school that the photographer had turned into a studio, darkroom, and bondage dungeon, there was still a lot of memorabilia left over from its days as an elementary school, which added a fantastic dimension of creepiness to the place. One shoot had me wielding an oxyacetylene torch. I’ve done multiple-day shoots in national parks, I’ve done shoots where I’ve spent hours in a make-up chair, I’ve been suspended from the ceiling, and I’ve posed for daguerreotypes and ambryotypes.

Is there anything you would change about the modeling industry if you could?

Absolutely. I’ve been trying to change it in my own small ways.

When I modeled in Australia for the first time, I was shocked by how well I was treated; it made me realize fully, for the first time, how much I and other freelance models in America put up with being disrespected, emotionally abused, physically violated, and financially shortchanged, without even realizing it. Of course, many American photographers are great people. But there are also photographers who get away with a lot, especially if they’ve got a big name. I’m sure anyone reading this can think of at least one or two famous photographers whose track records of physical or sexual assault haven’t slowed down their careers.

I’ve tried to combat this by putting my foot down firmly about my own limits; I don’t allow myself to get bullied into anything, from posing outside my comfort zone to lowering my rate for no good reason. It’s taken a lot of trial and error and practice to get to that point, though; at a shoot, it’s hard not to want to be a people-pleaser and just get along, or swallow back frustrations in order to be non-confrontational. Some level of being flexible and easygoing is really important, but it can be hard to find the line between “easy to work with” and “easy to take advantage of”.

Freya Gallows with flowered headDo you practice any sports and what do you typically eat? Please elaborate on the importance of nutrition and exercise in your life.

I don’t have an exercise routine, but I try to make activity a lifestyle; I don’t “work out” and what I do doesn’t feel like “exercise”. It’s just play. I climb rocks and trees, swim in rivers and lakes, snowboard and ski, scuba dive, do yoga, go backpacking, and have jumped on random opportunities to do everything from whitewater rafting to trapeze. I walk around small towns and big cities. I run around the beach with a few drinks in my belly. I play with dogs. I lose at push-up contests.

Nutrition’s important to me and I try to eat well overall, but I’m a bit of a gourmand. I don’t spend money on clothes or makeup, but I’ll blow money on really good beer, wine, cheese, or chocolate.

Sometimes people try to completely cut out “bad” foods that they love, like junk food junkies perpetually afraid of relapse. I personally think it’s a lot more effective and healthy to learn to practice moderation, and to find ways of preparing healthy foods so that they taste amazing without overloading them with sugars and fats and starches. I am very much anti starvation diets and cleanses, but I am pro juice fasting: I could talk about juicing all day, but for anyone curious I’d suggest the documentary Fat, Sick, and Nearly Dead.

Please share something people don’t know about you.

Well, I can pee standing up. And my first language was Mandarin, before English.

Would you change anything about yourself if you could?

Buddhism discusses cultivating “beginner’s mind”; you can’t fill a full cup. I want to learn and do everything, to go everywhere, to never get too comfortable for too long and to never submit for too long to holding patterns, neuroses, or rationalizations. To always be getting faster and stronger, physically and mentally. To learn to be more compassionate, easygoing, open, and humble, to internalize that no one can “make” me feel or do anything except myself. To get better at living presently and paying attention. Lather, rinse, repeat, until my heart stops.

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